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A quarter century in the making, Bone/Bat is a joint project from the creators from of Bonehand.com
and
Mightywombat.com, and is an audio collection of the intermittantly hilarious, profanity laden
musings,
declarations and arguments of longtime friends Steve and Gord, set to original, funky beats,
and
converted to zeros and ones for your listening pleasure. Please enjoy responsibly.
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WARNING:
Bone/Bat consists almost entirely of adult language and juvenile content, and as such should not be listened to by: children, adults,
the elderly, anyone who is pregnant or thinking of becoming pregnant, anyone who is having sex right at this moment, the capriciously litigious,
the humor-impaired, our mothers, pigeons, chickens, ducks, or turkeys, costumeless-high-school-age-trick-or-treaters, rats, former employers, parents,
telekenesists, little people, the blind, people who taunt wild animals, the French, crocheters, rapelling sommeliers, dead cats, customer service
professionals, clowns, Julie's Dad, our children,  residents of West Virginia, or anyone with a modicum of good taste, sense, and/or dignity.
Listener discretion strongly advised. You have been warned. Don't come bitching to us later.

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Steve and Gord

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EPISODE TEN "Aggro E Olio: The Pissed-Off Extended Dance Mix" - posted 06/15/08

This Episode: Steve and Gord double their usual length (and quadruple their girth) by
presenting the first ever BoneBat Pissed-Off -Off, a veritable lightning round of rage,
annoyance, and pique. Plus, they review the importance of handing out your correct
work number, give away a free CD, and offend everyone with "the Filthy Joke of the
Week". This episode's accompaniment of anger comes courtesy of Seattle's I Rot. [Link].

Speaking of which, got something that pisses you off? Then why not share it with the
Bone/Bat Crew! Email the source of your annoyance to steve@bonehand.com and we
will discuss what pisses YOU off in our very next episode! Don't miss your opportunity
to vent, Bone/Bat Style!

Episode Ten Music:
"Death Merchant 2008", "Vicarious", "Can You Tell", "The Most Horrible", "Monsters On The Hill", "Travelin' Man",
"Andrea's Daycare", "Violence in Human Form", "Patience", "Lines to Cross", "Nothing Left But Murder", "Death Merchant",
"Whoregun Grinder", Kill Everything" and "Hell Has Come", taken from the CD's I Rot and Kill Everything [Review]
respectively. All music by I Rot, courtesy of  BJ and their own bad selves Click the Pic to check 'em out.

I Rot

Pinto Gigante can be found by clicking the banner below. It whizzes all over every other metal podcast,
even when tardy.   

PG                                 

Gord's column Suburban Scrawl can be found monthly in the online magazine Davis Life. [Link]

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EPISODE NINE "Nostalgia, Grievance and Orifii" - first posted  05/25/08

Zombie Z  Hunchback
A few Topps "Weird Wheels" cards, as found in the Brandedinthe80s Blog. [Link]

This Episode: Steve and Gord look back at some cool junk from the past, gripe
about childhood chores, listen to awesome Midwest Ska, assess the early crop of summer
movies, and achieve a measure of clown closure. This episode's music comes courtesy
of Michigan's now-defunct Parka Kings [Link].

Thanks for the great music fellas, you are missed!

Episode Nine Music:
"City Limits", "Two-Tone Beat", "Whiskey Wine and Roserys", "Hip Ska", "Casino City", "Radio Song", "American CPS",
"Spring Ahead", "Dish or Die", "Slow Me Down", "Mob Boss", "Jacked", "One By One" and "Kidnapped", taken from the
CD's 23 Skidoo and Beinvenidos! by The Parka Kings on the Jump Up! Ska label. [Link] Both are now sadly out of print.


                       23 Skidoo            Beinvenidos           After Party

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EPISODE EIGHT "Tumbler of Love" - first posted  05/04/08
This Episode: Julie joins Steve and Gord for another increasingly filthy round of obnoxiousness
as they cover Gord's favorite headlines, the old cookie bait-and-switch, piss-poor customer
service, racy late night commercials,
clown-hiring danger signs, fashion for old people, and
magical fertility beverages; then mince words and plug those who shalt be plugged.
This
episode's epic speaker-wrecking musical offering comes to you from Chico, CA's The Makai
,
[Home] and [MySpace], courtesy of Seventh Rule Recordings. [Link]


Episode Eight Music:
"Hound of Hades", "Sedna's Tale", "Beast Born From Lies", "Fire Breathing Damsel Devourer", "Lady of the Lake", "The
Plague of Time", "The 10th Labor of Hercules" and "Gotterdammerung", all taken from
from the CD The End of All You Know
by
The Makai, on Seventh Rule Recordings. Buy It Here, or click the pic below!

Makai Button   Also Check out Pinto Gigante  
Pinto Gigante and Drunken Zombie! Drunken Zombie

Julie's new book UNCOMMON CROCHET is NOW on sale, and can be purchased  here at Powell's.com,
or at finer bookshops everywhere.

Uncommon Crochet        

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EPISODE SEVEN
- first posted  04/13/08
This Episode: Steve and Gord welcome crochet designer extraordinaire Julie "Skamama"
Holetz to the festivities, as they discuss filthy sponges, the swinging of dead cats,
suddenly defunct businesses, less-than-satisfying culinary vacations, Marital grudges, La Musica,
and how Julie came to be known as "Knuckles". This episode's cool-ass music comes from the
Acme Rocket Quartet out of Davis, CA. [MySpace], courtesy of Lather Records. [Link]

Episode Seven music:
"Inspirado", "Xtabentun", "Something is Rotten in Denmark", "Tracksuit Suite", "Lusitania (Long Beneath the Whelming Brine)",
"Dance of the Seven Veils", "Four Chambers of the Heart" and "Spoke French", all taken from from the CD Sound Camera by
Acme Rocket Quartet, on Lather Records. Buy It Here!

Sound Camera

Julie's new book UNCOMMON CROCHET is NOW on sale, and can be purchased  here at Powell's.com,
or at finer bookshops everywhere. As mentioned in the podcast, Julie's long awaited SEISMIC hat pattern can
be found HERE, a Bonehand.com exclusive!

Seismic Hat
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EPISODE SIX - first posted  03/16/08
This week: Gord gets his ass whipped by Coke yet again, Stale popcorn and CD packaging
get the best of Steve, and then they discuss snow tubing and parenting foibles, and plumb the
depths of the French Hole. 
Musicwise: This episode is all Barefoot Barnacle, all the time. They are from Seattle, and
they STILL fucking rule, and you should check them out  NOW by clicking the banner below.



Episode Six music:
"Catywompus", "Beauty of Bestiality", "Sea Enemy', "Urine Feces", "Severe Anal Regurgitation" and "Beer and Lotion",
all by Barefoot Barnacle.
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EPISODE FIVE - first posted  2/10/08
This week: Steve and Gord celebrate one full year of Bonehand.com, with
discussions of unrequited cravings, childhood disorientation, public restroom
etiquette, dubiously motivated cash windfalls, things that piss our wives off,
and the best place to keep the damned butter.

Episode Five music: 
"Oxygen Debt", and "Demon Blues" by Bonehand.
"The Natianal Anthem of San Kazakgascar" by San Kazakgascar.
"Beer and Lotion" and "Urine Feces" by Barefoot Barnacle.
and "Track Three" by T.S. Holub.

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EPISODE FOUR - first posted 01/06/08
This week: Steve and Gord discuss what pisses them off: The year in review; the curse
of the video game store; bad habits; and how to avoid tiger attacks; all while flipping the
bird to 2007, and meeting the new year at the door in a sexy negligee, martini in hand.

Episode Four music by Bonehand. TS Holub, and San Kazakgascar.

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EPISODE THREE - first posted  12/09/07
This week: Steve and Gord discuss a stunning lack of job security, the mistaken beliefs
of childhood, and as usual, things that piss them off. This episode features music from
Sacramento's freakin' cool San Kazakgascar.  Check out  their myspace by clicking
the album cover below.

San Kazakgascar Greetings 

Episode Three music:
"Dallas via Damascus", "El Rio Flaco", "Tuk Tuk to Nowhere", "Stun" and "Mosqitoes and Gnats"
by San Kazakgascar. All are taken from the album
Greetings From Beautiful San Kazakgascar, now
available from Lather Records. Bonehand commands you to buy It ! [Link]
 
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EPISODE TWO - first posted  10/28/07
This week: Our Halloween Episode! Steve and Gord discuss their profanity, some history,
Halloween rituals past and present, spooky movies, and extreme prejudice pest control.
This episode features music from Seattle's own Barefoot Barnacle. They fucking rule,
check them out by clicking the banner below.



Episode Two music:
"Beer and Lotion", "Urine Feces", "Severe Anal Regurgitation" by Barefoot Barnacle.
"Grim Grinning Ghosts",
"Demon Blues", "Mortgage of Doom (Instrumental)" and  "Oxygen Debt" by Bonehand.

Erratum: While both are influential Horror directors of the first order, Stuart Gordon is the director of the
awesome Reanimator films and From Beyond, and despite Steve's idiocy, should not be confused with
Herschell Gordon Lewis, "godfather of gore" and director of Blood Feast. Please make a note of it.

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EPISODE ONE - first posted  9/30/07
This week: Steve and Gord discuss the perils of camping, rennaissance faires, political
pet peeves, preposterous snack sizes, and those with an inordinate interest in poultry.

Episode One music: 
"Oxygen Debt", "Mortgage of Doom (Instrumental)" and "Demon Blues" by Bonehand.

"Track One", "Track Eleven", "Track Nine"  by T. Holub.

As mentioned in this month's Bone/Bat: Pigeons , by Gonzalo Ferreyra

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The Bone/Bat Show is Copyright 2007, 2008, G J Caulkins and S J Holetz. All rights reserved.
All music contained within Bone/Bat is original and copyright of the artist. 

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